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Jun. 23rd, 2002 01:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lwoodblooIT's been a very very interesting twenty four hour period.
First off, a mea culpa to a friend who I know is reading this. A wise blues scholar said it's hard to love someone when that someone don't love you. I may not love you, but I was/am interested. I shouldn't have blown up at you about your guy, and I hope he makes you very happy. I do not offer any excuses, just an apology. Not for my emotions, but for their expression. I'm not going to do this anymore. It's nonproductive, you said how you feel, now I have to fit how I feel into that. And I'm capable, and I'm doing it. There. I'm done.
I was bitching and moaning last night to everyone I knew. I've got woman issues, I backslid on not making them as important. I'm weak. *laughs* I admit it! I'm hopeless. I can't not be interested. It's against my nature and better judgment, in all honesty. My friend S. was online, and she noted my mood as I explained it, and called me. We had one of those "i have a full boat, and you have ace high" conversations where she knew what she was talking about and I was playing the Captain. you know the captain. CAPTAIN OBLIVIOUS! She's an old friend, actually, a recent ex of an old friend, but we've been close since they got together. He's a schmuck. I love him, but he's a schmuck. They are having a less than easy breakup, he led her on emotionally, she's been in the middle of hard classes, and we've talked a lot as of late. I had intimated that I might come up there; I needed to get away and be with someone who I liked. I had no intentions. I didn't think she was interested in me, so I never pursued. Besides, she was with jay. Just didn't seem like anything would come of it. Well....she kinda told me in not so many words why she wanted me to come to buffalo. Boy was I surprised. She asked me why I was so quiet. I told her that she had disrupted my argument. *laughs* Well, that and an offer to come upstate and snuggle with someone cute who you didn't expect to say so is a shocker.
That, and I made a new friend. Her name is Alix, and she's rockin'. She lives out on strong island and maybe we'll hang sometime. She's fun and cute and flirty. Hi alix!
Well. This was a long post. Longer than most. So no poetry. I know, I can hear the disappointment in the air.
First off, a mea culpa to a friend who I know is reading this. A wise blues scholar said it's hard to love someone when that someone don't love you. I may not love you, but I was/am interested. I shouldn't have blown up at you about your guy, and I hope he makes you very happy. I do not offer any excuses, just an apology. Not for my emotions, but for their expression. I'm not going to do this anymore. It's nonproductive, you said how you feel, now I have to fit how I feel into that. And I'm capable, and I'm doing it. There. I'm done.
I was bitching and moaning last night to everyone I knew. I've got woman issues, I backslid on not making them as important. I'm weak. *laughs* I admit it! I'm hopeless. I can't not be interested. It's against my nature and better judgment, in all honesty. My friend S. was online, and she noted my mood as I explained it, and called me. We had one of those "i have a full boat, and you have ace high" conversations where she knew what she was talking about and I was playing the Captain. you know the captain. CAPTAIN OBLIVIOUS! She's an old friend, actually, a recent ex of an old friend, but we've been close since they got together. He's a schmuck. I love him, but he's a schmuck. They are having a less than easy breakup, he led her on emotionally, she's been in the middle of hard classes, and we've talked a lot as of late. I had intimated that I might come up there; I needed to get away and be with someone who I liked. I had no intentions. I didn't think she was interested in me, so I never pursued. Besides, she was with jay. Just didn't seem like anything would come of it. Well....she kinda told me in not so many words why she wanted me to come to buffalo. Boy was I surprised. She asked me why I was so quiet. I told her that she had disrupted my argument. *laughs* Well, that and an offer to come upstate and snuggle with someone cute who you didn't expect to say so is a shocker.
That, and I made a new friend. Her name is Alix, and she's rockin'. She lives out on strong island and maybe we'll hang sometime. She's fun and cute and flirty. Hi alix!
Well. This was a long post. Longer than most. So no poetry. I know, I can hear the disappointment in the air.
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no subject
Date: 2002-06-23 10:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-06-23 11:23 am (UTC)